karla kingsley - back from the dead.

happy halloween everybody.

i had the best blog costume ever all planned out, but i didn't have the resources in place to pull it off... oh well. maybe later this week.

so instead, i am going to bring you a (dis)pencer first:

an interview!

so exciting. are you excited? i'm excited.

so, i am gonna interview karla kingsley, some of you may remember her as the one kicking your ass last year.

well, she moved away to california this spring, and has been kicking asses in the bay area ever since. ...and representing littleguyracing as well.

blogger is all f'ed up, so i can't post photos... but the interview is so amazing you probably won't notice.
here we go.

(dis): so, you have relocated to the bay area, (for god-knows-why), but you haven't come crawling back to the midwest yet... so i have to assume things are going well?
i hear the weather may be better in CA, any truth to that?

k: Things are going well in Cali, more specifically in Oaktown, where it's generally in the 60s-70s and sunny, with rain once in a while. It gets pretty foggy over in San Fran, and scorching hot when you go inland from here, but Oakland is perfect. The funny thing is, people here complain more about the weather than they do in the midwest. Seriously. The tempurature falls into the 50s sometimes and people are freaking out about the "winter" and getting out their Pearl Izumi amphib tights and neoprene booties and balaclavas.

Another detail -- so, we all know about "the wave", right? As I recall, SPBRC recently got positive reviews on SR's site for properly executing "the wave". For me, I liked the wave. It was a way to connect with those other kindred spirits out there on bikes, no matter who they were. If not the wave, they would at least get "the nod". But out here, effing hell. There's no way to nod or wave to all these hooligans on two wheels or you would never actually get down to the business of riding your bike. Geez. Still, I try sometimes, when I'm in a good mood.

(dis): and, have you located the best burrito?

k: I won't claim to have found the best because there are oh-so-many more places to visit. But the most spankin burrito I've been exposed to thus far can be found at El Farolito, at 24th and Mission. Definitely not one of those foofy fancy "California Cuisine" type places that are also so delicious. But you wouldn't like it, Spencer, because they use a lot of dead animal.

(dis): ok. so far, you got a few right, and a few wrong. it was a tough opener.
as you can tell, i like to play hardball in my interviews. (and i have done many).

hey, have you been following the racing back in mn at all? we've kinda taken the lack of blogging to mean you had either made some friends, been out biking, or joined a Krishna sect.

k: I can't believe you thought I had made some friends. It's pretty common knowledge that I'm unfriendly and anti-social.

As far as following the racing in Minnesota -- clearly, dispencer, you're not aware of my powers. I know what's going to happen at races in Minnesota before they happen. I know who's going to be on which teams before they even switch. I even have insider knowledge of new teams that may be popping up in the next 2,3, or 5 years. Of course, I know who's going pro. Sometimes I check out the blog-o-sphere to make sure my predictions are spot on. And they are. That's part of the reason I stopped blogging - I don't want to spill the beans on stuff that hasn't happened yet. More important than the racing news, though, is the drama. Wow, I don't know if I've ever seen the level of drama that goes on in the male cycling scene. It doesn't even compare to my days as a sorority girl. Hot damn, as long the fireworks continue every so often, I won't need to look elsewhere for my entertainment.

(dis): amazing! well, with your powers, then you have already heard about all of LGR's awesome suckcess! and how utterly dominating we will be next season! great!

plus, i am so glad someone loves the drama... sometimes it doesn't seem worth it...
oh well. all the best drama is on bikethrow.com, these days.

k: Yes, I hear that LGR has had a lot of sucksess, even some podium finishes in California! Wow! I'm sure the team will step it up some more in 2008. I can't wait. Unfortunately, my single LGR kit was absolutely shredded in my crash, which I'm going to take as a sign that it's time for me to move on. I'll be joining an as-yet unannounced CA team next season.

(dis): too bad about the crash, makes the return to jingle cross seem less likely... that sucks.

k: I dislocated my shoulder, in my last crit of the season. So now I'm pretty much washed up and out of shape, although I plan on showing up to a few [cyclocross] races to get hammered on.

(dis): so, how lame is hellyer compared to blaine? totally lame right?
i know.

k: yes! Hellyer compared to Blaine. UGH. Hellyer is made of this funny non-wood material that's barely banked at all. I've heard it referred to as the parking lot. Also, we refer to the freeways out here as "parking lots". Anyway. Blaine is awesome.

(dis): fyi: best burrito, 24th and treat (at balmy alley). cancun is good too, 19th and mission.

k: Yeah. I'll test out your burrito places, but I don't know.

(dis): i'm so sure you will. hey, so, velonews does hot/not, and road magazine does 20 questions... so being far superior as always, the(dis)pencer interview will wrap up with 20 hot/not's.

k: awesome.

california - hot. Let's be honest, I love it out here. But it all could burn in a forest fire anytime. Oh, and the apartment I'm renting lies pretty close to the infamous Hayward fault, which earthquakes in a major way every 140 years -- and last time it happened was 139 years ago. And homes cost a half a million -- IF you want a one-bedroom, or maybe a 2-bedroom in a shitty suburb 40 minutes away from SF.

minnesota - hot. Literally. It gets really hot there in the summer.

the u.p. - not. Definitely don't move there (what makes it cool is lack of people).

Grumpy's NSCx - sooooo beyond hot. unbelievable. a bunch of strapping young dudes putting on a cross race at a velodrome. If you don't go, you suck.

the mission district - way hot.

the haight. - not. well, it's OK, but there's a lot of needles.

piedmont ave./berkley --- you can't put those two on the same line. totally unfair. I refrain from commenting. It's kind of like saying: coffee/birth control -- both are good things, but in a totally different way, and barely related. [i can do whatever i want. -ed.]

yoga - not

hippies in general - not

scars - hot. I try to get two new ones per year.

lycra - so hot.

unicorns - not. sorry. [wtf? -ed.]

iron maiden - not. sorry again.

BART - totally hot.

MUNI - don't know, never done it, biking is ALWAYS faster. I'm gonna say not.

track racing - hot. it's basically like crack. but better (actually I'm not basing that on experiential knowledge). and better for you.

speedfix racing team - hot

cities that smell like urine all the time - not. which cities would those be? Oakland smells like donuts and coffee.

littleguyracing team - hot. hard to even touch them, really. although the hot level might dip now that i'm letting myself be wooed away by the possibility of being able to ride with teammates more than once a year. I bet they can weather it though.

karla kingsley - no comment. I'm way to humble to share my true feelings on this one.

there you have it. give her some comments.